When you forget to wear pants to work...

A new teacher in Wagoner, OK was found sitting in an empty classroom on Monday, wearing no pants and smelling of alcohol. 

Note: The comments posted to articles on this event are on the whole - appalling. While I expected to see criticism about what she did, I was completely unprepared for the judgments on her appearance. Please don't torture yourself by reading their narrow-minded and rude remarks. It will waste time you can never get back. 

I don't care who you are, if you screw up this badly, there's a much bigger issue at play than just lack of common sense. 

Clearly, she's hurting. Both before and after this incident. 

I think we'd be hard-pressed to find a person who could withstand this level of public humiliation without showing a shred of embarrassment or shame.

My heart aches for this woman. The mental picture I have of her sitting alone at her desk reminds me of how lonely and depressed I felt at my lowest moment when drinking. She needs our love, support, and encouragement - not snide remarks. I'm pretty sure it will be a long time before she can look back on this day and laugh about it. 

What is it about kicking someone when they are down that seems like a good idea?

Why do people get such a perverse enjoyment from saying negative things about people they don't know?

While I could be wrong, I suspect the same motivations behind this type of cyber-bullying is what motivates kids who pick on others at school:

If I pick on her, I will make people laugh, because they laugh at those kinds of things, and that will make me cool.

If I protect her, everyone will think that I am like her and they will pick on me too. 

I don't want to be like her, so I should pick on her to show that we are not the same.  

The other (more plausible) reason people are saying bad things about her, is because she screwed up in such a big way that they cannot imagine how/why/when they would ever screw up as badly. 

I cannot tell you how many people I have met in recovery, myself included, who did things we SWORE we would never do. We did not aspire to say and do these things, but often times we looked back on our lives and said, "how did I let that happen?"

We did so because we were drunk and addicted to alcohol. 

I am not a bad, unintelligent, or callous person because of what I said and did while drinking. 

I am a person who has said and done bad, unintelligent, or callous things under the influence of alcohol. 

None of us are perfect. We make bad choices all the time. That's what makes us human and unique in this imperfect world! Without bad choices and consequences, how would we learn and grow? 

It's what we do after our mistakes that defines our character. 

Taking charge of our lives and owning our mistakes is hard. Mainly because we have been taught that we needed to be ashamed for bad choices. My thought is that we are perpetuating the idea that it isn't okay to be imperfect. While we don't want to screw up, we should not think badly of ourselves when things don't go as planned. 

I am human. I am allowed to make mistakes. If I was perfect, I would be an angel or some shit. 

SO, if we expect to be forgiven for our faults, we should be generous with forgiving others. 

Forgiveness is not condoning or endorsing the bad behavior of others. It's simply a way to acknowledge other peoples' right to be flawed. 

If it's too hard to forgive someone right away, start by being caring to the person. Offer to help someone you need to forgive by mowing their lawn or going to the store for them when they are sick. When you extend kindness of any kind without intent for reciprocation or praise, you are practicing forgiveness because literally, the word "forgive" comes from the word "forgifan" which means: to give. 

I guess I need to find a way to forgive the twats who said mean things about Mrs. Lorie Hill.

The Booby Ban

I am so confused. But then again, I never understood why breasts were idolized in the first place. 

If a woman shows a lot of skin she is either praised for having a positive body image and expressing her femininity...or she's chastised for objectifying all women by using sex to promote herself. 

As I read these different stories I find valid points that I support in all of them... 

Rihanna wore a gorgeous dress to the Council of Fashion Designers of America awards and TLC blasted her for using sex to sell her music. In response, Rihanna found a picture of TLC topless, covering their breasts with only their hands, and tweeted it with a clever remark. (Rolling Stone) 

Meanwhile, circulating the internet is a beautiful story about a conversation between Mohammad Ali and his daughters. He teaches them that their bodies are sacred and like anything precious on this earth, God intended them to be covered and hard to get to. It's a sweet, metaphorical, and beautiful message. 

Then, there are some very well-supported arguments about the impact of telling girls to "cover up" on America's rape culture. It wasn't until recently that I realized how this idea teaches young girls that they are responsible if raped because they "tempt" males by dressing scantily. 

And don't forget that some people don't want their young, pre-teen, or teenage children to witness women publicly breast-feeding because it's "inappropriate". In response, many women have stood up to lobby for a mother's right to breastfeed her infant in public. 

Seriously? I'm dizzy from reading all these articles. I feel like I'm turning in circles. 

What if the reason we care so much about partial nudity is because we choose to make a big deal out of it? I mean, really, if you think about it, boobs are SUPER COMMON. Approximately 52% of people in the world have them. And if you don't have them, there's a good chance you've seen someone else's...

Does the ban on public booby exposure make them seem more exotic and rare? Is that the real reason breasts have become synonymous with sex? 

I don't know about you, but in my opinion, seduction requires a lot more than just bare skin....there's the sultry pout, suggestive maneuvers, etc. But by themselves, breasts are not equivalent to sex. 
So what's the big deal? If a woman wants to show some or all of her breasts, let her. If a woman wants to wear a headscarf, why do you care? If a woman wants to wear a ball gown to dinner at Denny's, don't stop her. 

Each person has preferences that are personal and unique. Who you are and what you like shouldn't bother anyone else and if it does, that's not your problem.